The Top Reasons To Get A Dog Instead Of A Man

1. Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
2. Dogs are already in touch with their inner puppies.
3. Dogs are very direct about wanting to go out.
4. Dogs think you are a culinary genius.
5. You can house train a dog.
6. Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.
7. Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.
8. Dogs mean it when they kiss you.
9. Dogs don't care whether or not you shave your legs.
10. Dogs obsess about you as much as you obsess about them.